I’ve visited GTA Online’s new Diamond Casino, and as a playing fan (in video games, for faux money), I’ve already were given a few proceedings.  The slot machines are a piece fundamental—there are no multi-line bets, and at the same time, as some have their very own precise sound effects, they’re all roughly identical machines with unique paint jobs. The roulette is dealt with nicely, however. Personally, I find watching a ball spin around a real bore.

There’s a cap on what number of chips you may purchase—20,000 for stroll-ins and 50,000 for VIP contributors. Honestly, this is probably a great idea, on account that you may purchase casino chips with GTA cash, and you may purchase GTA coins for real money, making this faux playing, doubtlessly, real playing. At the identical time, though, that is a sport wherein maximum players are in-game multi-millionaires, and it’s difficult to sense like a high-roller whilst you’re restrained to a tiny pile of chips.

Mainly though, I’m critically disillusioned inside the horses and the poker.

I get why the pony racing sucks and appears faux: it is a throwback to the authentic Inside Track from GTA: San Andreas. Inside Track is a having a bet keep in which CJ can put some cash on the ponies, after which watch the aspect-scrolling race on a TV monitor. This is exactly that: janky searching horses racing from left to right and transferring positions, like the carnival game wherein you shoot a circulate of water into a target to make your horse pass. And it’s lovable, do not get me incorrect. But it’s difficult to look at the pony races at The Diamond without considering the thousands of hours of programming and animation that went into the horses in Rockstar’s other big recreation: Red Dead Redemption 2.

All I can think is, hey, why now not get those beautiful ponies in right here? GTA and RDR are each cinematic reports. Real horse racing is dreadfully interesting (if you may try not to focus on the horses getting crushed through their jockeys at the same time as they run). So, why am I watching a shitty aspect-scrolling horse race and no longer a stunning, dramatic, cinematic, practical horse race? Because of a throwback funny story? If we can’t get RDR2 on PC, cannot we at the least have a look at its horses? I’ll grant that I’m making it sound easy when it’s manifestly now not as smooth as typing ‘import RDR2_horses; set DoACoolRace==authentic,’ however looking all the horsing round in RDR2 makes a person green with envy.

Even if you like the janky new Inside Track, I suppose we can all agree that GTA Online’s poker simply 100 percentage absolutely sucks a butt. It’s Three Card Poker. Three Card Poker. What the hell? Three Card Poker is not a terrible game in itself, but RDR2 has real Texas Hold ‘Em. I marched into The Diamond expecting to sit down at a right poker desk in a proper poker site and lose all my money. I am exceedingly dissatisfied (even though I nonetheless misplaced all my cash).

I have not performed RDR2 myself. However, I performed Red Dead Redemption, and its poker changed into super. I used to hearth up the sport and played it for hours only for the poker. I can handiest anticipate RDR2’s Texas Hold ‘Em (which was made to be had in Red Dead Online a couple of months in the past) is good, too. So why the heck is not it in The Diamond, together with some candy ponies to observe? It feels like an actual neglected possibility to master horse anatomy and layout proper poker for one recreation, after which placed flat horses and a casino version in any other.